cause it feels good..

Two posts in one week... man, I must really be overthinking, as usual.

None the less, this post is more of a chance for me to share with you a little something that soothed me up yesterday, after facing a frustrating situation here at work.

Know the name Sufjan Stevens? If you don't, shame. If you do, kudos. If you don't care, maybe this will help you to care.

I ask you to give it a listen, lean back in your chair, and run your fingers through your hair - or whatever helps get you in the mood to relax.

where i really want to be...

For those of you that do not know, I really look forward to the winter months. I enjoy the chill, I enjoy the seasons somewhat changing, and I greatly look forward to the snow that teases me from distant mountains.

Usually, I will watch snowboard DVD's in the summer months (actually, all months), tempting myself to the joy soon to come when the clouds roll in. Now that winter is here, I am extremely eager to bust out the warm jacket and take a breath of thin air. The snowboard DVD's are still in rotation, and the clicks on resort's webcams become a nice daytime mental vacation.



Yet, since it is winter, I can also look forward to the summer months. Ever since a summer camp experience as a youth (thank you Jewish Community Center), I have wanted to learn how to kayak. As a Jr. Counselor in my last summer there (yeah, that one rocked), we were treated on Friday's with a fun-day to get away from the little kids. For this particular fun-day, we headed down to Mission Bay and enjoyed a nice afternoon of bay kayaking. From there, that experience was built upon in an 8th Grade Catalina Island trip - where we kayaked in the ocean from cove to cove. Through high school, I was able to go river-rafting with our high school youth group (go Christ Lutheran, La Mesa, CA!)... that experience opened my eyes even wider to the dream of leraning to whitewater kayak.

I'm now 23, I have a steady job (that allows some summer time off), and even though I can't skip out of town everytime I want to see the snow... I can set myself up to enjoy the melted snow of summer.



So, the point of this post... how about the rationale that this post is more of a chance for me to escape to the mountains in thought, and to share some pictures that inspire me to get out to a local creek, grab my pack, and start exploring.

"my butt itches," and "peace-out-yo."

These are two phrases that are rattling within my head, soley from today's events. But, before I divulge those thoughts, let me take you back almost a week to catch up.

Friday Afternoon-Sunday Morning: 4 hours in traffic, some great kids, incredible staff, and a rockin' band… that was the High School District Youth Gathering, just outside of Palm Springs. Being spiritually fed with Jesus approved rock… it is quite lovely.

Sunday Afternoon-Tuesday Afternoon: 1000+ Lutheran teachers, a big hotel (man it takes forever to figure where you are), some inspiring discussions and lectures, fellowship to rejuvenate a tired heart, and a newness that is dandy.

Today: Now it's back to the original quotes, as shared by my niece Kyrsten. If I'm near Kyrsten, that means I'm in San Diego - hometown… in the crib I grew up in. Since I'm here, I took some time today to do what makes me appreciate San Diego - head over to Hillcrest and check out the thrift shops. I was able to accomplish this, all while getting lost by taking the back streets that I pretend I can memorize. After that, I treated my nieces, Kyrsten and Brittany, to a Santa Claus 3 movie adventure. That was quite fun, especially letting them wear my plaid jacket and flannel jacket in the movie theatre. (Maybe, just maybe, they'll adopt my spastic pizaz for fashion?)

On the car ride with them, I was giving a Spanish lesson to my 9 year old niece, while also giving my 4 year old niece a lesson on how to "rock-out" in the car with some killer tunes. This included the traditional headbang, the "rock-it' finger formation, and of course the air-drum solo. All this to which she replied at the end of the song with, "peace out yo."

And to this blog I say the same, until post-Thanksgiving thoughts brings me to post again.

Currently listening to: The new bird in our house sing me a song.

why work, even if this can wait?

I sooooo should be working right now, but it's my prep period and I'm allowed to use my time as wisely or unwisely as I so desire.

This post is being prompted by a quick stop into the Teacher's Lounge here at Bethany. As I walked in the door, a lovely little box greeted me... the box: "Mixed Nuts." A tasty medley of the oh so salty variety of scrumptious snack nuts.

Immediately my mind was prompted to, "That's the title of a DJ Krush song." Yes, that's right... DJ Krush. And before you get your mind onto some "boom booom boom, let me hear you say wayohhh... wayohhh" track, DJ Krush is not of that variety.

To describe poorly... great jazzy beats. To describe best... just listen. If you like, great, let's high five sometime. If you don't, sorry, but you probably won't like driving up a mountain pass with me, or even just chilaxing at my house on a random late evening.

So raise your glasses ladies and gentlemen... here's to tasty snacks that prompt misusage of time and great music thumpin in my head.

Currently listening to: DJ Krush - Roll & Tumble, from the album Krush.

NASCAR... Jesus would love it

(Originally Posted: Monday, September 04, 2006)


Whatever your feelings are on autosports racing and the subsequent NASCAR, please put that aside.

Now, please think of the last sporting event you attended. Then think to the beginning of the event. I'm guessing you're thinking somwhere near paying $$$ for parking and the national anthem? Good... stay there. For NASCAR, the beginning of tonight's race was starting like any other sporting event I've attended... except for one moment that blew me away.

Right before the national anthem was sung, right before the engines were revved loudly, a pastor led the entire crowd/drivers/crews of 250,000 in a word of prayer. Now, this prayer wasn't to just a "spiritual being" or anything anonymous like that.... it was a genuine "Lord," "Heavenly Father," "God our maker" prayer.

To think, that a sport mocked at being redneck and hick (which it can be), still has a strong respect and desire to have faith, Christian faith, as a part of its experience was very touching.

Never did I imagine how a little of my auto racing world and a little of my faith would colide in an incredibly heart warming way. (And if you're curious... I think I almost cried as I was so touched by it. )

a wish...

(Originally Posted: Tuesday, May 23, 2006)


Some students were sharing wishes they have - something they want to accomplish in their lifetime.... and this is one that resulted from a 6th grade student of mine:

"I wish that I could poop on the hallway floor... and then blame it on my dog."

I don't think there's anyting I can say to follow that up with.



Currently watching : Scrubs - The 4th Season

Bambi...

(Originally Posted; Thursday, May 18, 2006)

A qutoe from an 8th grade girl student in my class: "Oh my gosh... like Bambi's dad is so hot! Cause he is all brave and stuff and yeah that makes him hot."

Honestly, I just stared at her dumbfounded after she spoke. Then she started to realize how rediculous her statement was and began back tracking - saying she meant cute or etc instead.... but really, she said it with the same voice influction and tone that oh so many girls would have of their latest teen heart throb.

Quite entertaining to listen to and helps remind me that I really do love my job....

Currently listening to : Lucy Ford By Atmosphere

why emotions? why the church?

(Originally Posted: Monday, May 01, 2006)

Why is it everytime a trip ends I get emotional? There is something with the exhaustion and act of closing an event in my life (youth gatherings, road trips, and now national youth gathering district coordinator work) that gets me stretched emotionally.

Put me on a plane and it is hightened even more - the window to gaze out of, the Ipod whose songs are intentionally chosen to make me think, and the ultimate result are tears and reflections of a life towards Christ.

It's what I want, it's what I crave. More than any car excites me, more than any ideas of money or luxury, it's the goal of working in the church that makes me want and dream of a future.

As a kid who pretty much never went to church for most of his grade school life (Grades 4-8...), I couldn't have predicted this would be my craving. As a kid who saw youth group and church in high school as more of a social desire than a spiritual nuture, where did this craving come from?

It's all swirling in my head right now and it's all making me wonder.

out of gas...

(Originally Posted: Saturday, July 02, 2005)

Today was a momentous day. I had someone over to my house that was interested in buying my first car. Now... just to give a little background on this... She's been "up for sale" for almost two years now. This is the first time I've let someone come take a look at her. Protective? Yes. Unable to let go? Possibly so.

Yet, as I sit here tonight, waiting for the wine to kick in, I find myself wondering - "Have I ever troubled myself over in thoughts so much over a girl as I have with a car?"

In all honesty, I do not want to sell my 1st car. She's my baby. I washed her every Saturday for nearly two years straight. I worked and worked to get money to put performance parts on her. I wouldn't even let my mother or father drive it... going out of my way to make sure there wasn't a situation that arose where they needed to.

So as I sat in her today, looking upon the dash and instrument display, relaxing in the seat as I used to do... I couldn't help but have a flood of memories from a previous life flow into consciousness. I was a different person when I had that car - dressed more "conservatively preppy," dated and was attracted to different girls than I am now... had a different relationship with my parents than now.

And now I wonder more... have my choices with car purchases, restoration and modificiation... have they been wise? Yes they have made me happy, sorta have they been financially wise... but where are they leading me? I'm supposed to be a teacher soon... what am I going to drive if I have to take parents and students somewhere? What am I supposed to go to Home Depot in when I'm the responsible adult and build a swingset on Saturday? I then thought to myself... "If only I had a wife to just decide for me...."

Sometimes I toil over what parts or how to modify something... other days... it's looking towards the future and trying to plan ahead. Today was one of those days...

Currently listening to : The Very Best of Fleetwood Mac By Fleetwood Mac

a previous life...

Originally Posted: Monday, May 30, 2005

Cleaning sucks.... actually, it blows - my nose. Freakin arse, my nose is so stuffed from the dust. But... none the less, it has been interesting.

I keep finding random memories of my previous life.... that doesn't sound right, but my nose is dripping snot, so I really don't feel like going back and fixing that when I'd rather just get my thoughts out so I can wipe my nose.

But yes, I keep finding random memories - like, would you have guessed that I wanted to be a pilot? Yup... I was fascinated by flying aerobatics - those guys that do all the flips and barrel rolls. My dad used to fly airplanes, so I suppose it was the whole, "I wanna be just like daddy," little kid in me. Heck, he and I used to go to one of the little airports here in San Diego and watch the planes together and he'd tell me of the "good old days." Kinda sweet memory...

I also found a bunch of "First Honors" awards from high school - from the days when I cared about getting good grades. Hmm... how those times have changed. Yes, I wanted to do well in college - but, no, I didn't stress and attempt to please my parents... and certainly didn't attempt to please my professors - ha... my student folder probably speaks to that.

What else... hmm.. random summer camp stuff - an award for "always being there to keep the counselors on their toes..." Sounds like the nice way of saying, "always being a sarcastic little ass." They were so sweet to name it something else though.

Anywho... I'm done rambling... I suppose I thought if I typed it I wouldn't feel bad about throwing some of this stuff away... oh well.


Currently listening to : Le Tigre By Le Tigre