out of gas...

(Originally Posted: Saturday, July 02, 2005)

Today was a momentous day. I had someone over to my house that was interested in buying my first car. Now... just to give a little background on this... She's been "up for sale" for almost two years now. This is the first time I've let someone come take a look at her. Protective? Yes. Unable to let go? Possibly so.

Yet, as I sit here tonight, waiting for the wine to kick in, I find myself wondering - "Have I ever troubled myself over in thoughts so much over a girl as I have with a car?"

In all honesty, I do not want to sell my 1st car. She's my baby. I washed her every Saturday for nearly two years straight. I worked and worked to get money to put performance parts on her. I wouldn't even let my mother or father drive it... going out of my way to make sure there wasn't a situation that arose where they needed to.

So as I sat in her today, looking upon the dash and instrument display, relaxing in the seat as I used to do... I couldn't help but have a flood of memories from a previous life flow into consciousness. I was a different person when I had that car - dressed more "conservatively preppy," dated and was attracted to different girls than I am now... had a different relationship with my parents than now.

And now I wonder more... have my choices with car purchases, restoration and modificiation... have they been wise? Yes they have made me happy, sorta have they been financially wise... but where are they leading me? I'm supposed to be a teacher soon... what am I going to drive if I have to take parents and students somewhere? What am I supposed to go to Home Depot in when I'm the responsible adult and build a swingset on Saturday? I then thought to myself... "If only I had a wife to just decide for me...."

Sometimes I toil over what parts or how to modify something... other days... it's looking towards the future and trying to plan ahead. Today was one of those days...

Currently listening to : The Very Best of Fleetwood Mac By Fleetwood Mac